Desperately latching onto any viable alternative is the inevitable result of a sports-related labour dispute, so the arrival of the Bikini Hockey League is quite timely. Withdrawal is nasty, folks. Let me present to you the average mindset of a hockey fan at the start of an NHL lockout:
Day 1: “Whatever, they’ll have it all wrapped up before training camp.”
Day 8: “Who really cares if we miss the preseason? There are way too many of those games, none of them really mean anything, and they only really exist to pump more money out of the fans anyway.”
Day 16: “I hear that things are really wild in those Russian leagues. Lacerations, blood everywhere, crazy stuff man.”
Day 32: “Hey look, the CBC is playing simulated games at midnight. Maybe this is something the Leafs might actually win.”
Day 64: “MY NHL ’13 CREATE-A-PLAYER JUST RETIRED, HAD KIDS, AND HIS KIDS JUST GOT DRAFTED 2ND AND 3RD OVERALL TO PITTSBURGH! THE NEW PENGUINS DYNASTY STARTS HERE! BRINGIN’ THE CUP HOME! 2046! 2046!”
I’m not sure where hockey’s closest equivalent to the Lingerie Football League fits into this progression, but I certainly wasn’t expecting it this soon. But hey, titillation aside, why not take a look at it? If Gary Bettman, the NHL owners, and the players keep bickering for much longer, this could be all we have.