Insane Clown Posse vs. The FBI: Trial Of The Century

Or: Fuckin’ jurisprudence, how does that work?

Finally, the legal drama you’ve been waiting for has arrived! The Insane Clown Posse, who are questionably insane, generally act like clowns, and could be considered to be a posse of some sort, have taken exception to the FBI’s classification of their Juggalos as a gang. A lawsuit has apparently ensued, so brace yourselves: the ICP courtroom memes are coming.

Look, I’ll just get this out of the way right now: I fucking hate the Insane Clown Posse. It takes a lot for me to actively hate anything, so trust me when I say that it’s not a word I’m accustomed to throwing around lightly. But goddamn, folks; music (are we calling it that?) just doesn’t get any worse than this. ICP’s brand of, uh, hip-hop I guess, is unlistenable, pure sonic anathema to my ears. Nothing will clear my ass out of a room faster than someone throwing on a random ICP song and attempting to convince me of how “deep” and “meaningful” it is. Fuck that noise.

So, they’ve got that going for them, which is nice. That said? I take Jello Biafra’s old Offspring disclaimer to heart: if I don’t like something, I just don’t listen to it. I don’t really care for how some of the juggalos tend to act, so I don’t hang around any of ’em. Simple as that. It’s a non-issue in my life and to be honest, I’m not sure how the FBI can expect to conclusively prove that their classification is just. There’s a difference between being a gangbanger and just being a moron.

Of course, knowing how a lot of juggalos rush thoughtlessly to the defence of their facepainted bannermen at even the slightest provocation – stand up and take a bow, Something Awful – I hope for their sake that their lawyers at least know how to type.

I can’t wait to feast my eyes upon the Insane Clown Posse sitting in a courtroom wearing their full clown regalia. It’ll be like something out of an episode of Harvey Birdman. Unintentional hilarity like that can be hard to find… well, outside of an ICP music video, of course.

Source: The AV Club. Image: Wired. Little side note: searching Google for an appropriate image for this article felt like someone was emptying neon glowsticks into my eyeballs. ICP fan “art” looks how Mountain Dew tastes.